How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
