Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
