If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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