we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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