Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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