beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
