You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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