i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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