in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
