Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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