dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He? As in you personified your dick?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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