Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
My hand turned me down
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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