and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
And then my night got REAL pukey
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
