I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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