I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
sarcasm needs its own font
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize