K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
