PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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