I forgot how hot balto sounded
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize
