I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
