now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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