i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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