Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
