Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
