I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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