So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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