Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
