so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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