i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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