I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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