meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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