also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize