Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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