Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize