Your face is a jimmy john
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize