Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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