let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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