And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize