I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
