What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Even my vagina gasped.
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There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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