I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
