i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
