i was born a porn star she said
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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