C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
