I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
