Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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