Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
