hotel room ftw
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice