i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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