i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
