but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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